Things you crave when you have young kids.8:19 AM
Privacy to do your bidness in a public bathroom. Kayla is 8 but to me, she's still a tiny baby so when I have to use the washroom, she comes in the stall with me. I realize I can have her stand right in front of the door but what happens if her shoes suddenly disappear? How am I supposed to chase the bad guy who is trying to kidnap my daughter with my pants around my ankles?
So I make Kayla come into the stall with me. I ask her to turn around and face the door while I do what I need to do but sometimes, curiosity gets the better of her and that's when things like "you have hair on your vagina" or "why do you have a string there?" come out of her mouth and echos in the bathroom #mortified.
Privacy to do your bidness in your own bathroom. Kids will ignore most of what you say/happens around them except for two things: when they hear a candy wrapper you're trying to stealthily muffle as you try and sneak candy and when you're trying to go to the bathroom. It's as if once that click of the door is heard, they immediately think it's an invitation to incessantly bang on the door calling for you. Do you know how hard it is to concentrate with that kind of ruckus going on? Just give me 3 fucking minutes of quiet where I want to hear nothing but my own grunts.
Quiet time. Kids have one volume - LOUD. What is it about children who think they have to shout in your face/ear like you're in a club trying to have a conversation.
Sitting there just doing absolutely nothing. I miss the days of being able to sit on the couch and grow roots without having to get up or talk to anyone for hours. When you have kids, sitting on the couch it means you turn into a jungle gym and you have someone climbing all over you or wanting to play hairdresser or someone shouting in your face while climbing all over you and wanting to play hairdresser.
Uninterrupted sleep. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Grant it, it's much easier when they're older and can actually sleep through the night. It seems that once you get used to blissful sleep, something throws a wrench into their sleeping patterns (read: asshole school friends telling Kayla scary stories) and suddenly you're with a newborn again.
Alcohol. Because you have kids.
Guess who's on vacation until next week Thursday?
We leave for Mount Tremblant tomorrow morning for 5 glorious days of snowboarding, eating and relaxing. 6 other families are going so it's going to be so much fun. Today I spend the day finalizing our packing, making a wine run and getting the last of our books at the library.